A Part of Me Is Still There

The first comment my father made to me after a year apart was something to the effect of how thin I was. I shrugged it off, knowing that I probably had lost weight given the jogging and dining habits and I picked up in Germany, but I doubted my appearance could have changed so dramatically. I hadn't noticed much besides loose trousers, after all, and since I never owned a scale, self-observation was all I had upon which to rely. But today, as I was cleaning out my closet in preparation for yet another move, I discovered a copy of the results of a physical I took just before departing for Germany. Then, my height was 6'0" and my weight a normal 175 pounds. Today, my height remains unchanged but the scale in my mother's bathroom gives me a consistent measure of 152.5 pounds.

Though losing over twenty pounds off an already slender frame would be remarkable (if a little unsettling), I'm inclined to reject the data on the sterling basis that I simply can't believe it's true. Perhaps I should not be so hasty, however, seeing as I have discovered such an effective weight loss remedy. It's so easy: instead of eating no carbs or only liquids, all you do is eat less and exercise regularly and the pounds just melt away.

How the medical profession missed out on this method, which I call the D/E System (Diet and Exercise), boggles the imagination.